Forgiveness – A Gift To Yourself

Many people struggle with the issue of forgiveness. They have difficulty forgiving themselves as well as others. Nearly everyone has been hurt by the actions or words of another. Whether this is intended or not, you may begin experiencing negative feelings such as anger, confusion or sadness, especially when it’s someone close to you. These feelings may start out small. But if you don’t deal with them quickly and embrace forgiveness and move forward they can grow bigger and more powerful. They may even begin to crowd out positive feelings. Grudges filled with resentment, vengeance and hostility take root when you dwell on hurtful events or situations, replaying them in your mind many times. When you don’t practice forgiveness you may be the one who pays most dearly. By choosing forgiveness you choose peace, hope, gratitude and joy.

Forgiveness is about accepting responsibility for your actions or the part you played in whatever occurred between yourself and others or even within yourself. This brings greater understanding of the Self. It frees up your energy so it can be put to better use. It allows you to move forward in your life and not spend time and energy thinking about how angry you are or what some other person did or failed to do for you. You health will also improve when you do not focus on negative thoughts and emotions.[/LEFT]
Taking responsibility for your own feelings and reactions is mastering your “ability to respond”. You learn to consciously choose rather than simply react. Forgiveness takes away the power the other person continues to have in your life. Through forgiveness, you choose to no longer define yourself as a victim. Forgiveness is done primarily for yourself, and less so for the person who wronged you.

Forgiveness does not mean allowing the painful behaviours or actions of another to continue in your life. Forgiving someone does not mean that you condone their behaviour. The reality of true forgiveness lies in setting yourself free from holding on to the pain. Sometimes it means letting go. You forgive them and release them. When your heart is closed and you feel resentment or anger and sadness it’s difficult to see anything good. When your heart is open, you are able to let go of the negativity and you are able to release old thoughts and feel joy once again.

Forgiveness of yourself or someone else, though not easy, can transform your life. Instead of dwelling on the injustice and revenge, instead of being angry and bitter, you can move toward a life of peace, joy and kindness. Commit to treating others and yourself with compassion, empathy and respect.